The difference between Red and Blue politics

It’s no surprise that states which have the good fortune (read: informed voters) to have their governments led by Republicans are much better off than those who squandered their opportunity.  But here’s a little story which aptly explains why in terms anyone should be able to understand.

(The Political Commentator) —

California versus Texas: One is pro-business and pro-growth and the other…well…not!

California coyote problem

The governor of California is jogging with his dog along a nature trail. A coyote jumps out and attacks the governor’s dog, then bites the governor. The governor starts to intervene, but reflects upon the movie Bambi and then realizes he should stop because the coyote is only doing what is natural.

He calls animal control. Animal control captures the coyote and bills the state $200 for testing it for diseases and $500 for relocating it. He calls a veterinarian.

The vet collects the dead dog and bills the state $200 for testing it for diseases.

The governor goes to the hospital and spends $3,500 getting checked for diseases from the coyote and getting his bite wound bandaged.The running trail gets shut down for six months while the California Fish and Game Department conducts a $100,000 survey to make sure the area is now free of dangerous animals.

The governor spends $50,000 in state funds implementing a ‘coyote awareness program’ for residents of the area.
The Legislature spends $2 million to study how to better treat rabies and how to permanently eradicate the disease throughout the world.The governor’s security agent is fired for not stopping the attack. The state spends $150,000 to hire and train a new agent with additional special training, re: the nature of coyotes.
People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals (PETA) protests the coyote’s relocation and files a $5 million suit against the state.
Texas coyote solutionThe governor of Texas is jogging with his dog along a nature trail. A coyote jumps out and tries to attack him and his dog. The governor shoots the coyote with his state-issued pistol and keeps jogging.The governor spent 50 cents on a .380-caliber, hollow-point cartridge. Buzzards ate the dead coyote.

And that, my friends, is why California is broke and Texas is not.

Comments

  1. Nice story. Might even help people forget the benefits of cheap labor and Federal subsidies.

  2. I’m guessing that a .380 is probably not the best choice for coyote. But, great point nonetheless.

  3. I don’t know if that’s exactly how it would have gone down in California, but that’s exactly how we do it in Texas.

    Dang’d ol’ coyotes (pronounced ky-yotes).

    God bless Texas!

  4. I didn’t miss the point of the story, but I’m more intrigued by the idea of a coyote killing a dog. What the hell kind of dog is it? My wife’s parents live out in the country with coyotes all over the place, and their Doberman loves to hunt them down. She’s torn them to pieces.

    • Well, T… In California, no tellin’ what type of yip-yip dog we’re talking about. In Texas, it don’t make no difference.

      Forgive me. I just made a trip across Texas, listening to every hick Texas country station I could find (including one out of La Grange that was pretty good). My roots are showin’.

      I’ve been meaning to write a post about my trip to grandma’s.

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